Book Club: Chapter 1

Why A Christian Home?

Chapter 1 talks about why the Christian Home is the most important place on Earth. Wolgemuth states that our homes should be the place where dreams come true. Why can't that be the case? He writes about an afternoon thunderstorm that came in fast and quickly flooded the home where his mom lived. His father was out of town on a business trip and the waters were rapidly rising. He tell that his mom raised her hands and cried out... "Precious Heavenly Father, I love you very much. Please stop this rain! " and it stopped. What an amazing act of faith! Wolgemuth says that the next morning when he arrived to check on her, there was the house he was raised in standing in the middle of a pond. Incredible.

Do we pray with that kind of Faith?

Wolgemuth states that his home was the "different" home. That his friends would wait on the lawn waiting for him to get finished with dinner in order for him to be able to play outside. In their family dinner time was for catching up with each other, prayer, Bible study, and family worship.

He says his friends knew there was something different about his home.

Is there something different about your home?

Wolgemuth offers a statistic about a talk that is given to prisoners. Bill Glass a former Defensive end for the Cleveland Browns speaks to those who are currently in prison. He says when he speaks he always asks "How many of your parents told you you'd end up here someday? "

He states the amount of those that raise their hand is staggering.

This point proves the amount of power we as parents have to influence our children. How powerful our words can be in building up or breaking down.

You only get one chance at the home making deal, and time is not on your side - but the message is not shame and blame. It is instead urgency, focus, purposefulness, intentionality, and care. Why is it easy to lose this sense of urgency and a sharp focus on the importance of our home-building efforts? What can we do to prevent that shift away from the essential?

The ingredient that makes a Christian home special and different in a good way is grace, and grace means salvation, forgiveness, hope, genuine happiness, purpose, and power. What evidence of grace do you see in your home? Ask everyone who lives there for specific answers.

New Book Club Starts Today!

The Most Important Place on Earth

Our new book "The Most Important Place on Earth" by Robert Wolgemuth is now available! You can order it from Amazon or pick one up at Gardendale-Mt. Vernon UMC children's department. We are excited to introduce to you and your family this new book! Robert is author of many books including "She calls me daddy" and "Pray with me, Daddy" along with many other books. He has been an author and publisher for over 30 years.

I cannot wait to go through this book with you! It is truly a wonderful experience. Today we are discussing the Introduction. The book's introduction begins with a comparison of this book to a cafeteria line. He says that there is all kinds for "appetizing things you can pick and choose from." In no way are you expected to take everything from the book but you can pick and choose what would work for your family and use that. He also lays out that fromt the title of this book, you can tell it is told froma distinctly Christian perspective. He states that from research for the book, he found studies that say that very little of what we believe is reflected in our lifestyle. That is an alarming statistic!

Our Homes Should Be Like FlyPaper

Wolgemuth says that as a child he remembers visiting his grandparents home in Pennsylvania. He remembers flypaper everywhere in the house. He says our homes should be like the flypaper of the neighborhood. That we should be the home people are drawn to. Children shoudl be drawn to our yard, our neighbors should feel comfortable coming to ask for a cup of sugar, or borrow a couple of eggs. People basically should be able to look at our Christian homes and think "wow, there is something different about that home."

Do our homes represent that in our neighborhoods?

Are we willing to put the time and effort into making our homes reflect Christ?

Join me as we journey through this book to see what exactly a Christian home looks like and why it truly should be "The Most Important Place on Earth."

Mary Did You Know?

We've all heard the song, "Mary Did You Know" but do we really stop and think about that. Did Mary really know. That night when the angel spoke to her and told her she would be the vessel for the Christ, the Savior of the World, did she know? When she went to see Elizabeth and the baby in Elizabeth's womb leaped for joy (Luke 1:44). Did she know?

I think the real question is, does it matter? Whether she knew the enormity or not she obeyed. She was open the plan God had for her. I was over at http://www.incourage.me/ reading the other day and found this blog http://www.incourage.me/2010/12/why-a-true-christmas-might-be-painful.html. It is titled "Why a true Christmas Might Be Painful. " Please take the time to read it if you can. She writes about what it really means to be a womb for Christ.

May we all be open to becoming a vessel for Christ this Chritmas.

Chapter 7: Fostering Faith

According to Barna, "Instilling character will build a good adult, but not necessarily an adult who loves God. So in addition, we need to instill values and beliefs that will lead children to a deep and lifelong faith in God." (pg 93 Revolutionary Parenting Workbook).

Below are the values and beliefs that Barna discusses:

• The Bible is THE source

What role does the Bible play in your life? Describe how often you read it and why.

• Absolute Moral Truth Exists

If you were going to have a coversation with your children about what truth is and where we can go to find it, what might you say?

• The Church is our support system

What help is your church able to offer in reinforcing faith lessons you want your children to learn?

• Servanthood should be a lifestyle

What obstacles do you face in making service at least a monthly habit for yourself and your children?

• Prayer is essential

When can you pray with your children? Make a list of opportunities you have.

• Love is the Centerpiece

What can you do this week to let your children know you love them?

Chapter 6 "Behaving like a Parent"

Many parents are embarrassed tobe The Parent. It's so authoritarian! But great parents embrace the role without apology. Parenting is not a democracy! Great parents say they are in charge and Act like it! Great parents learn to control their tempers.

*Because our words have power to damage, we have to develop the discipline to control them. Not investing the effort to do this isn't an option. It's an evasion to blame our children when we lose our tembers - if we lack self-discipline, how can we expect it from a child? - Barna Revolutionary Parenting Workbook.

Questions:

1. How often do you find yourself angry at your children?

2. What do you typically do when you are angry at them?

3. What is one thing you could do to grow in controlling your temper?

4. Do you typically have a reason for your decisions that you could explain? Or do you tend to repond to your children by instinct? Describe what you do and why?

5. What is one step you could take to manage your time better to have more time for your children?

6. What are your strengths and weaknesses when it comes to listening to your children?

Weekly Challenge:

Make a plan to spend time withe ach of your children to deepen your relationship. When will you take tie with each one? What will you do together?

Book Club: Chapter 5 Drawing Lines in the Sand

One of the Chief things parents do to build character in thier children is to establish and enforce the boundaries within which children must live. Kids need a consistent picture of what is right and what is wrong. But there's a limit to the number of rules children can remember and you can enforce. Pick your battles. You need a handful of rules that reflect your highest values, the main characther issues you want your children to internalize by the time they're adults.

1. Do you have a set of rules tha tyou consistently instill and reinforce in your home? If so what are they?

2. Here are the top dozen rules Revolutionary Prents told us they focused on. How do these differ from yours?

a. Tell the Truth

b. Never cheat or steal

c. Make sure at least one parent knows where you are at all times. Get parental approval

before going from one place to another.

d. Show respect for others, now matter how you feel about them.

e. Help and serve others.

f. Control your tongue.

g. Do not judge other people's motives. Judge their behavior only insofar as it personally affects you or your family members.

i. Take good care of your body.

j. Actively pursue your faith.

k. Do your best at school.

l. Do your household chores.

m. Accept punishment as an appropriate response to breaking the rules.

Challenge: Sit down with your children and your newly formed set of rules and discuss them with yourkids. Ask them what they think. Did some seem like a new idea? Ask them which ones they think will be the hardest to keep.

Chapter 4: Developing Character

If our goal is to raise children into adults who love God and others passionately, then our two main jobs are to foster faith and instill character. The two go hand in hand-character grows in the soil of Faith. The below principles are from interviews Barna did with Revolutionary parents. These are the things they think made a difference:

• Start When Your Children Are Young


• Create A Plan


• Make Time to Talk with Your children about character


• Provide structure


• Don't let your own needs dominate

1. Take some time to think about each of your children. How would you describe each one's personality, strengths, and weaknesses?

2. What roles (such as attending church each week, spending time with extended family, being home for family dinners) or household tasks (such as cleaning their room or taking out the trash ) do your children know they're expected to do consistently?

3. Which is more important to you: To see your children outperform the other children in their classes or to see them love the other children in their classes?

WEEKLY CHALLENGE

If you had trouble with question 1 because your children's unique traits aren't clear to you , what can you do to make time over the next week to spend time with them, observe them, and reflect on what they're like?